Why must mankind insist on producing DAPs shaped like a romantic representation of a bodily organ which pumps blood every so often? Do girls really dig blokes who buy them stuff like this, or do we have to preload them with mind-blowing classics like Air supply's "All out of Love" and "Karate Schnitzel" by Tenacious D first?

Well, regardless of anything, the Kiss MP3P comes with removable face covers - all shipped in this oversized box containing only the finest fibres of 100% pure turtledove feather and accompanied by a "woohaa, hippies rule the earth" CD containing some software (plus an MP3 compilation of "The very best of 20 years of Gwar" if you find the Golden Ticket).

Your loved one will be thrilled for sure. Have a safe night.

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