Three new PMP's have reported for duty. Let's do a full-cavity search on them while we're at it. Get in line, soldiers!

Name? JaceTech DDP-1500, sir! What capacity you got to offer, boy? 20GB, sir! Length, waisteline and shoe size please 120 X 90 X 30 mm, sir! A bit of a fatty, aren't you? Well, let's see... Are you capable of singing or acting? Sir yes, sir!I fully support MP3, WMA, as well as MPEG-1, MPEG-2, MPEG-4, WMV9, DivX3.11, 4.xx, 5.xx,Xvid (Support *.smi), sir! Impressive! What else have you got to offer? TCP/IP, Web Browser, Wireless 802.11b, sir! FM tuner, sir! JPEG-support, sir! Video-out, USB2.0 + Host & Compact Flash slot, sir! Eyesight? 3.5 full color TFT, sir! What's your weight, fatty? No idea, sir! What you mean, no idea? Hand me your passport and give me 10 on the double soldier! Here's my PROOF OF LIFE, sir! Alright, dismissed. Next!
	Name? imuon PMP-AH120A, sir! What the heck kind of name is that? Have you got the guts it takes to be in my army? I've got disposal of a 1.8" 20GB HDD, sir! Length, waisteline and shoe size please 110.5 X 64 x 23 mm, sir! Hey, JaceTech, look at this soldier! Now that's more like it huh? Are you capable of singing or acting, mr imuon? Copy that, sir! I fully support MP3, Ogg Vorbis and AC3, as well as MPEG-1, MPEG-2, MPEG-4, DivX3, 4.xx, 5.xx, VOB, sir! Well don't just quit there! Anything else that makes you stand out? Wired LCD-remote, JPEG-support, Video-out through either composite, s-video or component2 USB2.0 + Host & Compact Flash slot, sir! Eyesight? 2.2 inch 262k color TFT, sir! How much weight are you carrying around then? 203 gram, sir! Nothing too shocking there... Where are your identity documents? THIS WEBSITE has more information on my design, sir! Next! Can't wait all day long in this type of weather!
Name? Sytec Systems MVP-100, sir! What's that, royal blood or something? How many Gigabytes are you carrying around, huh? 20GB, sir! Length, waisteline and shoe size, soldier! I'm sorry but I've got no idea, sir! Well I be darned, what good are you to me and my comrades anyway? Are you capable of any decent singing or acting? Sir yes, sir! Divx, Xivd, AVI, MP3, WMA, OGG and AC3 are on my repertoire, sir! Anything else you'd like to share with us? Not in particular, sir! Just that i'll be revealed next month and will probably have a built-in camera module (1.3MP), sir! You ate enough carrots for a decent eyesight? I'm using a 3.5 full color TFT, sir! What's your weight, fatty? No idea, sir! What is it with you youngsters these days? I'm not asking for much... Anyway, just give me your license and registration number then... Yes sir, here are my RUMORED SPECS, sir!

Allright, that's it. I haven't seen anything today what I did not see before. Ah well, that built-in camera thing was nice... As is the line-remote controller on that second lad. But you boys better mean cheap labor or the army can't use you at all. Attention! At ease! Dismissed.